Finding Love in the Divine Feminine Within

“The way you learn to love yourself, is the way the world learns to love you back.”

As a woman, I am inspired to ignite my fellow spirit sisters with a flame of courage to awaken and live life more fully within your own self expression – a place that resides in our hearts, rather than in our heads.

It’s a calling to the deepest desires of every woman’s soul, granting permission to gracefully walk along side each of us.

It’s a passion that applauds, our inner beauty, honor for self, and relationship to our divine spirit.

It’s a spark that lights up when we claim ourselves fully, living in our own highest truth, surrendering only to our wisest voice.

It’s a power to manifest a dream for a life that has more peace and harmony because we now have it within ourselves.

We are women who choose to live in the truest expression of our authenticity and illuminate our unique magnificence to the world through our stories, which carry the gifts to nurture other women, our children, our homes, our communities, and ultimately the universe with the juices of our totality. This is how I live in the freedom of my own femininity, and I welcome you to join me.

My motivation to live a more purposeful life today, one that is guided by authenticity in its truest form, stems from my own childhood. From a young age, I was never seen in the light of my own identity or voice. I felt very unsupported in who I understood I was meant to be in this world. I was always grouped into the shadow of my older sister or pressed into the tainted archetype of how a growing woman should behave. I let my path unfold while trying to conform to cultural standards of acceptance as I was growing up, but I felt pain and a deep inner suffering as the years went by. I continuously made decisions and took directions in my life that met other people’s expectations but not my own. I associated love with approval and deemed it to be conditional.

Time passed and I continued to search for my grounding and acceptance in the world – on the outside, and I became more and more disconnected. I still didn’t understand that the fuel for my core desires lies within. I somehow maintained the belief that solutions were found in the voices of others, even though my unsettled spirit continuously pulled at my core, driving me to seek freedom in outlets of therapy, energy work, and healing practices that gave me a safe place to be me fully.

I remember fighting my spirit, shoving her under the rug time and time again whenever she attempted to reveal herself to the world. My soul felt choked, abandoned, betrayed, and neglected, left with raw open wounds waiting patiently – with unconditional love – in my shadow, for me to one day find my way back to unleash her will and her voice with pride.

And then, something happened. I went through a pivotal experience that changed my life.  The universe hit me head on with what was one of my greatest fears, and it was time for me to either stay small or stay true. I was scared, really scared, and despite a very difficult road that lay ahead for me, my resilient soul surged out of hiding with courage and conviction screaming at me to stay true. She reclaimed her place – and it definitely wasn’t in my shadow anymore, but alongside my heart.

The journey began by grieving a life of a family that no longer existed with my ex and a child we shared. I began figuring out life as a single mom and trying to nurture the sense of suffocation I bore from an even deeper wound while processing the parallel between my parents’ divorce and my own. The characters were different, but the story was very similar. The difference this time was that I wasn’t going through it as a child, but had a child of my own. I now had a duty. It was time to take 100 percent responsibility for the person I wanted to be and the type of woman I wanted to grow into. I committed to the process of change and living with integrity towards my highest truth. Despite the anguish of my situation, I stayed focused on the gift – a chance to create a new legacy and do things differently than those before me.

And so, I began nurturing my own shattered spirit with the honor and grace I expected out of life. I committed the next four years to learning how to have a deep personal relationship with my self. I wasn’t on a mission to forget; I was on a mission to forgive. I redefined the terms of love, integrity, and respect with my soul. I learned that life on the outside is only a reflection on what is going on inside.

I invested in support groups, coaches, NSA work, sacred feminine retreats, fear workshops, family counseling, massage therapy, osteopathy, journaling, physical fitness training, private mediation training, yoga therapy, applied kinesiology, homeopathy, parenting workshops, flowers, herbs, magnetic therapy, marriage counseling, holistic nutrition, you name it. Basically, I became committed to anything that felt in alignment with helping me process, heal, connect, and find my way back to the woman I knew I was destined to be.

Why such commitment now? Because now I had a daughter.

As a result of my growth and expansion, I’ve learned life is a journey about refinement and living in our hearts knowing and embracing all that we are, just as we are. But by far, my daughter has been my greatest guru. She has taught me about unconditional acceptance and self love. Almost daily, she prances around with a big, bright, pink bow hairband on living in her true self-expression. She has helped me find my own voice in being a voice for her. I strive to live more authentically every day with as much courage and confidence she does, so naturally. I now call it pink bow bliss! I believe, we all have what I call these “pink bow” moments where we are undoubtedly guided by a deeper truth to live more fully in our purpose and our own unique magnificence.

And so, today, I live my life from a much different place.

I’m a woman who …

Is more in love with all that she is versus what she is not.

Is in relationship with who she is in the present instead of who she was in the past.

Who doesn’t’ judge her journey, but appreciates the lessons and finds gratitude in her evolution.

Has embraced the richness of tuning more into her heart, than staying in the limitations of her head.

Has chosen to take responsibility for her life with passion and purpose instead of accepting that this is the way it is.

Is happier being more planted, rather than thinking she need to be perfect.

“The way you learn to love yourself is the way the world will learn to love you back.”

By honoring our experiences, we are able to live more fully in our own unique stories with a greater love of who we are. We become examples to our daughters of how to embrace ourselves with courage, heart, and a greater confidence.

So, as a result of this life and learning, my mission is to awaken the desires and delights of every girl (big and small) in believing it is right and good she is a girl. One who honors her experiences, tells her stories, and refuses to carry the sins of others with her body, or life, surrendering only to her own highest truth and wisest voice.

Put on your big pink bow and celebrate the juicy pleasure of being nobody but yourself – in a world which is doing its best, day and night to make you into everybody else. This means to fight the hardest battle in which any human being can fight, and never give up!

Are you ready?