Why I Friend My Exes on Facebook

In my life, I have been blessed with many relationships that, like seasons, have come and gone.  While it’s good to put the past to rest, I believe it’s healthy to embrace these experiences, good or bad, and the people beyond them. For the most part, I’m over that time of my life. But the fact of the matter remains, their place in my life holds weight and significance. It was, after all, a relationship, even if somewhat flawed. Yeah, it didn’t work out, but that doesn’t mean there wasn’t love present; indeed there was.

“God Bless the Broken Road.” This song was one my fundamentalist friends and I would play and replay back in the day, our hearts crooning for the need for love, craving a sense of security that comes from that fullness of the divine.

As I listen now to the familiar lyrics and music, I sense a deeper meaning than once felt in the pews of the church; a realization that, indeed, these former romances are the guideposts that, however crushing at the time, brought me to that sense of security, love, and completion I sought after so desperately. That love I speak of is what I call the “divine within,” or rather, my self. It has come to my full understanding that I am my truest and most faithful love.

This is such a vital discovery and necessary in every aspect of my life. No longer will I expect or accept the abuse of those undeserving or the acceptable norms of the status quo. I’ll go beyond and truly love me for all that I am deserving of, surrounding myself thus with those that have that equal appreciation for me as well as themselves. For we are our truest loves. Finding this, we find the answer to all the questions we seek – finally, at last, peace and sense of life purpose.

We know we matter and that we have worth. That is something that can’t be taken away from us.

For this reason, after the crushing blow of rejection, the hard good-byes, and the fallen tears, I welcome my exes back into my life with open arms, grateful always for their purpose and influence in my life. For, truly I do not want that taken away from me.