The Path to Purpose

A couple of traumatic events at the age of 12 and 13 changed my life for good. It left a deep impact on me subconsciously, and nothing was ever the same. Everything went downhill from there.

I soon began experiencing panic and rage attacks, and I remember feeling incredibly insecure and having no self-confidence whatsoever.

Going out in public places, especially crowded places, was hell to me. Sometimes I could keep my anxiety under control, and other times I had to get out of there immediately because I felt hyperventilation coming up. On top of that, whenever I was in a crowded place, I would suddenly feel as if I were having an out-of-body experience. It was really weird and it’s still very hard to describe, but it honestly felt as if I was no longer in my body.

Living with an anxiety disorder and depression, especially at such a young age, made me feel like I wasn’t “normal.” It gave me a very poor quality of life.

After struggling with anxiety and depression for several years, I finally agreed to be treated at an outpatient mental clinic for three months when I was 16. I was diagnosed with several mental-health issues, such as depression, anxiety disorder, unresolved grief, unresolved childhood trauma, and inferiority complex. I had anxiety and rage attacks that were often so bad, I had to be sedated. I was just 14 years old and didn’t feel comfortable leaving the house without taking my tranquilizers with me.

The best way for me to describe being depressed and having suicidal thoughts is: It’s as if your brain randomly and suddenly experiences a short circuit. It might sound weird, but to me, that’s the only way to describe it. Every day I was fighting a battle in my head—and the scariest part was that I never knew who was gonna win: me or the demons in my head.

For 11 years, I struggled with anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, insomnia, self-harm, self-hatred, feelings of unworthiness, and every other negative emotion you can think of. Until I hit rock bottom (again) at 25 and decided I’d had enough.

I was depressed and taking antidepressants, and I was afraid I had to go to therapy for the rest of my life. I was just so sick and tired of all the negativity in my life while others were living it up and achieving things (or so it seemed).

I felt hopeless and knew things needed to change, because I was on the verge of giving up completely.

But, honestly, even in the darkest moments, I had faith in God. He was able to give me hope.

Somewhere deep inside, I believed He was putting me through all of the struggles for a reason. I kept believing that God would reward me if I would just hang on and fight through. That’s when I learned about the Law of Attraction.

In only four months, my life transformed completely. I started learning about the Law of Attraction and began working on myself: my mindset, attitude, habits, beliefs…everything.

My personal-development journey began, and I embarked on a journey to find my God-given purpose in life. After all those years, I finally understood that life was not happening to me but for me. I finally understood what forgiveness was, why it was important, and how to do it. I began to understand that challenges and obstacles are meant to make us grow, evolve, and expand.

Four months had gone by, and I hadn’t taken a single antidepressant. Instead of sleeping in until noon, I was getting up in the morning and feeling healthy and energized. I just felt as if my life had meaning again.

My self-confidence got a boost, and I started to believe in myself and see my full potential. I didn’t feel lost in life anymore. I had a crystal-clear vision for my life and future and actual goals that I was actively working on to achieve.

It was then that I was convinced I had been put through all the pain and struggle for a reason, and I finally saw the purpose of my pain.

Several years later, I felt ready to begin coaching other warriors on the path to their purpose. I’m a completely different person now, with a completely different mindset, attitude, habits, and vision for life.

Finding consistent happiness, true fulfillment, and inner peace after depression is 100% possible—and I made it my mission to help other survivors achieve just that, so they, too, can live a joyous and prosperous life.

About the Author | Tatiana C.

Tatiana C. is a purpose-driven woman of God who believes everyone has a God-given purpose in life, and she's passionate about helping depression survivors find it. She believes we all have the power within to break free from our painful past and create our own reality. Tatiana is a global LOA/life purpose coach, happy wife, depression survivor, and advocate for positivity.

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