1 May at 01:27
Thought of tonight: If there were a chance or an opportunity to take another turn in life, to choose to be different…an opportunity to be what we want to be, open about choices and visions, real about what we could and could not be…if we could re-choose, to be born again, to be somebody else…Would I take that chance? Would I grab the opportunity?
If life were about having no regrets, no untold or hidden feeling, no lasting heartbreaks and tragedies…then, what is it we live for? What is it we are?
Is it fear that’s holding us back from living? What is it? What is it?
1 May at 10:52
The heartaches caused by those we cherish the most, that come at times when we least expect it, are the heartbreaks we cannot bear nor believe we are going through.
It is not about forgiving. It is a choice, whether to continue or to stop, whether to take a step forward or many steps in the opposite direction.
Then the end comes, weeks away from the much-awaited beginning.
But there shall be no regrets…no regrets.
2 May at 20:50
Looking back at how much I believe that love is very powerful in that it can shut down a wide open door of problems in just one second after the love prevails and gains back the battlefield…I must have been fearless or insanely in love.
Love is one of the many ingredients needed to create the magical moments of non-understandable and imperfect situations…to get to see the sparkle in the eyes of your lover, to see love in those same eyes despite them being tired or awake.
Love is just one of the ingredients, I repeat. It must be there to keep us from failing to be a whole together, not half complete nor dependent, but complete as individuals with and without each other.
Even words fail to describe what it is!
2 May at 23:08
The impact of a sudden detachment might not be felt right away. To be paralyzed emotionally is the first response that the system chose this time, not fear nor sadness…not regrets or loneliness yet…Those might not come at all.
No aching detachment should be healed with an immediate new attachment. The heart must settle down first, then the many memories and dreams.
The heart must take slowly into consideration, after waking up, that the mind had no other choices to make but what has been decided. The mind will take responsibility…it sure will
4 May at 14:04
How heartless we discover we’ve become makes us feel ashamed and burdened towards those who claim they love us. We have no responses, no feelings left, just nothingness.
7 May at 02:50
The things keeping us from falling asleep as soon as we put our heads on the pillow are either the closed doors we forcibly closed or the still open yet unsure paths that are tempting and irresistible and mostly risky and that we choose a thousand times in our unconsciousness…or both !!
And believe me when I say that those still untaken paths are our favorite!
Sleepless nights seem longer, colder, and lonelier. But strangely comforting and calm that even the neighbors’ dogs didn’t bark once the whole time!
9 May at 22:21
We resist our dreams and expectations, our way of imagining what our next chapter would look like.
We build entire galaxies and planets. We go from being extremely excited and happy over seeing somebody, to extremely saddened and heartbroken because what has been burning up in our heads and hearts didn’t make it to the outside world…the reality where everything seems difficult and out of our own reach.
Beside all the things built up there, I still believe, not as strongly as before, that anything can happen. Literally anything.
15 May at 16:35
Some days, words come out and won’t stop, as if they were a river, the kind of crazily windy days when it won’t stop raining from all directions.
And other days, I feel so empty inside, so astonished and wondering…very speechless and quiet…very unpredictable to my own consciousness! Very odd and cautious! Very unlike me.
16 May at 00:01
Some need proof of their exes’ disloyalty in order to start the detachment phase! They cannot agree on the fact that they were at fault in the first place. They would do all sorts of things to make themselves look like victims while making their exes look extremely unfit and full of mistakes!
Can’t it be clean-cut, the way I wanted it to be? Should we end up wounded that deeply? Could we bear any more heartaches?
Human behavior is way more unpredictable than anything else in the universe!