Why Your Mom Always Told You to Tell the Truth

If you’re like most people, you had parents that told you to—no matter what—tell the truth. When I was a kid, I used to think this was because my parents wanted me to be an obedient, good little girl—but now, as an adult, I can see that it’s about so much more than that.

Don’t get me wrong. There are still days when I roll my eyes at the idea that the absolute truth is something we owe ourselves and the people we love. There are still days when I think, You’ve gotta be kidding! This is what I signed up for? Because, as I’m sure you’ve experienced, dancing with the truth can be exhausting. And freaking tricky. Especially as far as other people are concerned.

But when I ask myself this question of why it’s so important to tell the truth, I always come back to my ultimate answer: It’s about making sure that my insides and outsides match…that the words I speak and the actions I take are a reflection of who I really am.

But every time I ask myself the question of why it’s so important to tell the truth, I always come back to my ultimate answer: It’s about making sure that my insides and outsides match…that the words I speak and the actions I take are a reflection of who I really am.

Let’s take it a little deeper, though: What does it really mean to tell the truth, and why is it valuable? Here are some of my main reasons:

1. It teaches you to be honest with yourself. It can be really easy to get swept up in our idealized images of what life is supposed to look like, or to convince ourselves that we’re okay even though that voice in our head keeps screaming that we’re not. Self-honesty lets you know exactly who you are and what you stand for—and helps you move in the direction of people and situations that support that. And, trust me, it becomes easier with practice.

2. Telling the truth creates authentic relationships. Relationships based on truthfulness aren’t always easy, but they are real, which means that they are ultimately kind. Instead of wasting time people-pleasing or making promises we have no intention of keeping, we can bring all of ourselves to the table. This is how we discover that we are capable of the rarest kind of generosity: the kind that makes no assumptions or impositions, and that allows others to be similarly and wildly themselves.

3. It saves you so much time and effort. When it comes down to it, lying takes a ton of energy. Authenticity might suck at certain points, but at least it means we aren’t creating a tangled web that someday we might have to wrestle our way out of.

The truth is so important to me that I’ve built my personal and professional life around it. I’m committed to being a truthteller and to helping other women do the same.

Now, I know you’ve heard me say “truthteller” over and over, but what does that word really mean?

Truthtelling is about sharing unapologetically from your heart, with courageous vulnerability, honesty, and realness. It’s about no bullshit. It’s about how you engage with truth, in both your life and the world around you.

Ready to Step into the Power of Truth? Join Our Retreat!

And, if you’re ready to step into the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, Courageous Truthtelling: A Workshop for Women to Embrace Our Stories and Voices was made for you! This special retreat takes place September 6–8, 2019, at the gorgeous and rejuvenating Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health, in Stockbridge, MA. 

Courageous Truthtelling offers women a safe, brave, and supportive space to create the deep connections we need in order to move beyond limiting beliefs, discover our voices, step into our power, and strengthen our connections with one another. 

You’ll be guided through an intimate, powerful process for sharing stories so you can experience healing, empowerment, and connection. You will also be supported in identifying and diving into your most authentic and heartfelt personal stories to build trust and confidence, and to take decisive action in your life. 

Here’s what some of what our former participants have to say about the unique experience of being part of a Wf1 retreat:

“I loved having the opportunity to work one on one with other women in the group. I loved the flow of all the sessions, as well as the willingness to allow what needed to happen at the time. There was so much space to allow masks and layers to fall away. I also loved meeting new friends, listening to each other, crying, feeling both pain and laughter, and releasing together.” —Jill Nichols Hicks, Founder of Illuminating Women, Seattle, WA

“The safe container was beautiful, and the invitation for fun and “no rules” was refreshing. I got to do some much-needed healing; I was also able to speak my truth about an old story and begin rewriting a new one! Being able to share with others who are not directly connected to my inner circle was wonderful. I was touched and in awe of the beautiful Wf1 staff. Each of you touched me with your kindness, and I will never forget how you all made me feel. Kelly and Nirmala….wow! Thank you both from the bottom of my heart.” —Angela Caceres, Temecula, CA

“I loved having permission right up front to do whatever I needed for my own self-care. Everything had a place and purpose for me, and everything fit together in the end. The mantra I created during one of the exercises, ‘I will own my brilliance,’ will serve me for the rest of my life. Without even consciously trying to transform, the steps/exercises from the retreat gently guided me into alignment with myself, and I feel it on a cellular level. It is now embodied for me.” —Beth Halleck, Winona, MN

Join us in the picturesque Berkshire mountains of Western Massachusetts for a weekend of sisterhood and solidarity! Courageous Truthtelling will be an unforgettable experience in an unforgettable setting, so don’t miss out.

 

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About the Author | Kelly McNelis

Kelly McNelis is the founder of global community, Women for One, a speaker, coach, facilitator, and bestselling author of Your Messy Brilliance: 7 Tools for the Perfectly Imperfect Woman. With more than 25 years of experience as a nonprofit and small-business consultant, Kelly empowers generations of women around the world to build the relationships, community, and confidence they need to achieve their wildest dreams. She finds daily inspiration in spending time with her husband and children in her home outside of Seattle.

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