I Think I was Born with a Hole in My Heart
I think I was born with a hole in my heart.
I think I was born with a broken heart.
I was a quiet baby who walked late. My parents told me, “I was the best baby.” Looking back, I think that meant I was observant. I was keenly aware of my surroundings and carefully watched the human behavior occurring around me.
As I grew up, this sensitivity became a liability. I listened to the criticism of others and internalized it. My ego’s voice became my truth. I lost my mom to breast cancer when I was only 16 and developed anorexia three years later. I didn’t know how to use my sensitivity as a gift. I crawled into a hole of disordered eating and isolation. I stayed there for a decade.
Eight years ago, on a spring day following the birth of my second daughter, I surrendered to the beautiful Truth about myself. I decided to embrace the parts of me I thought were negative. Turns out, my sensitivity is an asset. The broken pieces of my heart let the Light creep into my life. The hole in my heart allows me to feel the feelings of others. It enables me to extend compassion, hope and help. My pain could be my purpose. My pain could heal others. My broken heart serves as an invitation to make a contribution to this world in some small way.
Since that gorgeous spring day, I have written a book about my journey to freedom from an eating disorder. I am releasing my first meditation album this month and have a second album due out in September. I have started a non-profit organization, A Dollar Makes A Difference. The goal of A Dollar Makes A Difference is to spread love and kindness by offering a dollar bill to an unsuspecting stranger in exchange for a pearl of wisdom about life. It is my way of spreading a little love throughout the community and bringing light to the parts of our hearts that need it the most.
With Love and Light,